Boston, MA – Everyone remembers their first time doing love-make. For some of you, maybe it was with your high school sweetheart on the night of the prom. Or for others, maybe you found yourself under the bleachers near the football field, trying to tickle helmets with another confused boy scout. I’m often asked “Martin, what was your first time like?”, and if I had to sum up the experience with one word, that word would be “dry.” Obviously, I would have preferred a more slippery reception, but beggars can’t be choosers when the magic happens while working part-time in a nursing home.
Speaking of dry, let’s get ready for this weeks’ Wednesday Wouldya. Per usual, I’ll go ahead and start us off with the voting….drumroll…..I would. Yep, I know, shocker. But, if I could tag Hilary with four minutes of pure powerthrusting, I’d be able to cross “first lady” and “vampire” off my Fucket List. Now, guys, you know I normally don’t give out my bedroom secrets, but my signature dismount is guaranteed to drive that special lady in your life wild. Right after you hop off, take dead aim at her noggin, and just before launch inquire with your best English accent, “Pardon me, would you have any White Poupon?”
"It's my honor to be here today with Borat"
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I gotta go with NO here. This might be a first.
HAHA. If it would help save America would you?
If it would help save the nation, yes. Yes I would.
(Red for Pres, 2012!)
Maybe if her pork fingers weren’t in the picture, ruins it for me.
I hope she reads these comments some day. She’s horrible.
Martin I suppose you went with yeah for pure shock value. Even Bill decided a 1.2 million pound hippo was a step up.