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Wicked Improper Clears Up Confusion About Tyler Seguin’s New Tat

"Tyler mimes a teeth brushing"

A lot of hubbub about Tyler Seguin’s new tattoo – What is it, Where did he get it, why is hockey televised?  Well regarding the “What is it” question, no one will ever know.  It’s a Carly Simon kind of career long mystery that he may unveil when his career is in the sh1tter.   I personally see a Lord of the Rings take on “The Scream,” but whatever.  It’s clear what the 61, 65, 95, and 98 signify.  No, it’s not the years his parents and sisters were born.  It’s the four ages of women between *ahem* legal age and 100 that he wasn’t able to “card” in the year since the 2011 Championship.  Rumor has it that Marchand got ‘em all (naturally, that swarthy bastard), so Seguin lost the bet, thus this awful lifelong reminder that he isn’t the cocksman he thinks he is.

6 Responses to “
Wicked Improper Clears Up Confusion About Tyler Seguin’s New Tat

  1. met says:

    Dude take a picture of me with my shirt off is really gay. Even for a hockey player. PS: Winnipeg suxs!

  2. Lanny Olson says:

    The name “Winnipeg” comes from the Cree words meaning “muddy water,” referring to Lake Winnipeg 40 miles to the north.

    The things you learn–fascinating!

    • Martin says:

      If we can apply that same logic to my recent trip to Colorado, the several bowls of Green Chile I had at various establishments (including the airport) caused me to leave Winnipeg in several toilets.

  3. Red says:

    I just Winnipegged in the company stall. Destroyed, Jackson Pollack style.

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