"Christian Hobbs, Meat Pounder"
SALEM, N.H. (AP) — Police in Salem, N.H., say a man who did maintenance work on a woman’s trailer is accused of cutting holes in a bathroom floor and installing baby monitors to secretly record her. Police arrested 44-year-old Christian Hobbs of Orleans, Mass., on multiple charges Wednesday. They said the woman noticed movement in the trailer’s air duct saw Hobbs looking up at her. Police said Hobbs had sold the woman the trailer a couple of years ago. He did work on it two weeks ago. Police claim Hobbs admitted to crawling under the trailer with power bars, drinks and tissue and stayed for nearly two days, watching the victim and videotaping her in varying states of undress; he allegedly had 16 short clips on his cell phone. An investigation showed baby monitors were hooked up in the bedroom and in a dryer duct. It wasn’t immediately known if Hobbs had a lawyer.
Wowie. Well, what else can you say? Christian Hobbs of Orleans, you Sir, are a Meat Pounder. What’s the old saying? “When the going gets tough, the tough crawl through the aluminum air ducts in your camper to videotape your beaver?” If nothing else, at least Christian executed his plan with Boy Scout-like precision and came prepared for his meat pounding marathon. “Power Bars for energy and stamina? Check. Drinks for additional nutrients and to stay hydrated? Check. Tissues to cover my tracks and wipe up endless amounts of jism launch from the vents? Check.” This guy army crawled through cobwebs, dust and other shit smelling foulness I can’t even imagine, all for a two-day peekaboo at some pussy. I guess you could say he’s like the Andy Dufresne of jerking off.
Hahahahaha! IDIOT! Also, awesome Shawshank reference
Thanks. I hope the other prisoners call him Andy.
Call me crazy, but I don’t think he gets jail time.
I think you know you have a masturbation problem when you’re stocking up supplies to live in someone’s crawl space.
He is misunderstood. He thought it was movie night at the trailer park.
I could actually understand it if he was hiding in the attic or something. Cleavage, exposed boobers, ass crack, and maybe flashes of periodic beav, etc. This guy clearly has a thing for secretly looking directly at pussies from 3 feet below.
F-ing lol…power bars, drinks and tissue. Creeeepy. I knew you should always double check the vents. I hate that guy.
Plus, do you think power bar should be capitalized/trademarked by the ap? Those guys are probably at the top of the list anytime anyone googles “meat pounder”
Sponsorship opportunity?
I can see the commercial now. Have you ever felt sluggish while climbing under the trailer to watch upside down tacos, well try the new Meat Pounders Power Bar! MPPB, there when you need stamina that lasts!