Yahoo: Arizona Cardinals season-ticket holder John Coulter was at Saturday’s game, and as one does, wanted to get a picture. Also as one does, he was holding a beer at the time. So he handed his beer to his 15-year-old son for temporary safekeeping. And shortly afterward, he received a visit from some undercover stadium police, who informed him that he had been serving alcohol to a minor and would be immediately escorted from the stadium and handed a citation for trespassing.
“I thought it was a candid camera joke, I really did,” Coulter told USA TODAY Sports. “We just watched the opening kickoff and I wanted to take a quick picture. I literally handed my son my cup and said hold my cup, I reached into my pocket, grabbed my cell phone, put it on camera mode and took a picture.”
“Providing alcohol to an underage person or an underage person in possession of alcohol is a Class 1 misdemeanor,” Sgt. Wesley Kuhl of the Arizona Department of Liquor License and Control told USA Today. “The consequences could be up to, and this is a maximum, of two years in jail, $2,500 fine and three years probation.”
Nice catch, Sgt. Kuhl. I hope the Arizona Department of Liquor and License and Control owns this and sends this deadbeat dad to prison for two f-ing years. “What?! He served his 15-year-old liquor! We simply have no choice but to send him to two years of hard labor to think about his crime.”
I couldn’t care less if that kid polished off that $9 Bud Light in a NFL Commemorative 2013 Arizona Cardinals ™ souvenir cup, THIS is what it’s come to in Arizona? They bought all this surveillance equipment to halt illegal border crossings, but
the Supreme Court public opinion the White House is against it, so fi, we’ll just crack down on the 50 people that show up to watch the Cardinals every week, and the terrible scourge of this nation: Underage beer holding. “Nothing’s whiter than bringing your kid to a Cardinals game! Can’t drop the race card on us for this one! Fuck ‘em!”
I’d suggest we all ban Arizona Cardinals games, but aren’t we basically doing that already?