If I had one wish, it'd be worldwide peace. If I had two, it'd be worldwide peace and boobs.
Beltway Pundit: The United Nations Twitter account has 1,462,872 followers. In return, the UN follows 537 accounts – mostly foreign UN special missions, dignitaries and international heads of states. However, buried in the list ConstitutionSchool.com discovered one account which seemed oddly out of place: “Penelope Black Diamond.”
Penelope! For the record, there are something around 200 million active twitter accounts. The UN has chosen to follow less than 1000 of those guys. (disclaimer: For some f*cking inexplicable reason, Wicked Improper is not currently one of them.) That why you pay the UN the big bucks: to make the tough decisions so they’re not wasting their time on bullshit.
As you can see, the UN is very, VERY discriminating when choosing who(m?) to follow
I told you this style would take hold
This is not so much an update as a simple “I told you so.” Girls, when I tell you to jump, you jump, no questions asked. Just a week ago, I told you that this style was going to take
Marblehead beaches worldwide by f-ing storm, and here is another example of how you are missing the boat if you don’t f-ing hurry up and get one of these. This particular one is a DIY version, and as a public service, the before and afters are included below for your careful review:
Does the term "tensile strength" apply here?
Is that a banana in - wait...
It’s been a long weekend where we’ve spent an inordinate amount of time redirecting words like the one used to describe a pile of sticks (in the 13th century) and also “whore”, which I don’t think means anything else except what you think it means. But rest assured! The internet is still full of flumes. I leave you with these two samples as proof. Sorry they’re so big but I can’t work my gd computer.
ps – I’m still team Stacey.
It’s not because he doesn’t drink Diet Coke. It’s ’cause t1ts, that’s why.
This is what people in places like Austin TX are doing right now.
Feel free to discuss. I’m going to Starbucks.
Come 'n' Get It.
Weekly Standard: In 2012, 532 people were murdered in the city of Chicago, according to statistics compiled by the Crime in Chicago website. The number of people murdered the year before was 441… The website also claims that, through December 25, 2012, there 2,670 people were shot in Chicago last year. That’s also an increase from the year before, when 2,217 people were shot in Chicago that year.
In all, it means that on average almost 1.5 people were murdered in Chicago each day last year, while on average 7.3 people were shot each day.
Well this can’t be true at all, because Illinois already bans concealed carry (and open carry in most instances) and Chicago demands that gun owners get a Firearm Permit, and register EACH gun with the CPD. With such strict gun laws, who in the world is still shooting each other 7.3 times per day? No no, the media must have this story wrong.
Let’s get back to wondering when BiBi Jones is coming back to Alex’s Gentlemen’s Club, shall we?
They just might save your life, is what I'm trying to say.
KSEE: A Canadian woman has her breast implants to thank for saving her life in a shooting committed by her ex boyfriend. Eileen Likness, of Calgary, testified at the trial of her ex-boyfriend Wednesday that if it weren’t for her surgically enhanced breasts, she would have been seriously hurt or even killed. ‘My implants took the brunt of the force.’
The victim explained that when Fernando Chora, 61, fired his 9mm handgun at her, a bullet grazed her right arm before piercing both her breast implants and left forearm. Likness said the projectile, which entered her right breast, grazed her chest plate and exited her left breast, destroying the silicone implants.
I’m going to make this short and sweet because I’m
1. Good call on making that 61 year old geezer your “ex.”
2. It will not be long before our government mandates breast implants as safety devices. No judgment on this one. How can you argue with the validity of this data?!
3. Haha, crazy Canadians. (And you can shove your pacifist accusations about gun-totin’ cowboys in the States up your collective ass.)
Boston, MA – As we get into our later years, our flexibility becomes very important to the well being of our bodies. You must use your mind, your body, and if you’ve still got one (i.e. you’re not in Sales), your soul. For centuries, if not hundreds of years, ancient Chinese people were bending their bodies into different shapes to prolong their lives for some reason. Some have wondered which came first, the jack knife pose or the fortune cookie. We may never know, but what is indisputable is if we let our body motions remain stagnant and in a constant state of repetitiveness, such as wallowing for hours on end in a cube, or constantly taking long dumps, etc., you become more likely to get arthritis. Do a search in your community for Yoga Classes that will help you live longer so you can continue paying never-ending, insurmountable bills. Here’s what you may find a typical class to look like:
"Sea of Farts"
Of course, there are many forms of Yoga, so if you would prefer some “Safe For Work, Safe For Everywhere” images, please scroll down. We are pleased to bring you a blog that has only your health in mind.
Poses courtesy of Jordan Carver Yoga. Captions with pose names courtesy of Martin Munson.
"Point Them At The Sky"
"I Cordially Invite You For Ass Play"
"Upside Down Reverse Cowgirl Flume"
"The Horizon Is That Way"
The very definition of Gravity Defying.
Here’s wishing Martin a death (and gravity) defying birthday!
When you ask “What’s Martin like,” and many of you have asked that, there are several ways to answer. Some say he’s quick with a quip, some say he was born without the ability to a) black out or b) wake up hungover. Mrs. Munson, if you asked her how she’d describe Martin, would probably say something like “picture one Coke can stacked on top of another Coke can.” Ouch.
Now I don’t know about that, but I’m going to speak for Martin when I say that if his whole entire day was obscured by giant boobs, his birthday would be considered a tremendous success.
Well, it’s decided. We’re moving to an all breast and ass format. The blogs literally write themselves, I mean, look how easy this is. So, from now on, here is just a whole bunch of tits to look at. Happy Birthday Red, you ol’ tit looker.
And here is some of the ass I was talking about.
No doubt in my mind, she kills her partner(s) after mating.
Wicked Improper’s being invaded by Spanish software developers (yes), so I thought I would make them feel at home with this picture of what has to be Spain’s #1 export since Columbus, Natalia Mesa Bush.
Yeah, her name is Bush, so what?
The judges are going to allow it.
Answer: If she can avoid political statements like tearing up pictures of the pope while at the same time ensure that her accessories are spilling out of her dress, then yes. Actually tear up whatever you want, just make sure about that second part.
Fergie knows. Oh yes, she knows.
I was all set to give up on her, but Fergie’s making me want to stick to my guns in the classic question regarding her and Josh Duhamel, which we posed to you way way back when we
didn’t know how to feel like centering our post titles.