Introducing “Fresh Balls”

"So fresh"

 

Wow are my balls fresh. I’ve been using this product called “Fresh Balls” for a week and my balls have never been so fresh and so full. Sure, half of the fun is applying the lotion, but the other half is the hours upon hours of the freshest smelling balls that you’ll ever smell. Can’t be here to smell my balls? Well, let me describe this wonderful scent for you. Picture baby powder mixed with the freshness of a fine Irish dew. My balls are that fresh. Did I rub this lotion all over my balls and accidentally slide by and mash it all over my taint and crack? You bet your stinky balls I did. I have put Fresh Balls all over my balls in the morning, went to work where I sit on my balls and taint all day long, went to the gym, went home and just before getting in the shower, I smelled my own balls. Guess what? Still fresh. Never again will I have to peel a stinky set of balls off the inside of my thighs like a Fruit Roll-Up. I’m really excited to approve this product, and here’s the link for you to get your own Fresh Balls. You are certainly very welcome.

www.freshballs.com

(Web site safe for work, For external use only, FAQ’s at Fresh Balls says to not eat Fresh Balls so do not eat Fresh Balls, Not a good sign if your wife comes home from “working late at the office” and her breath smells like Fresh Balls.  Wickedimproper.com not responsible for your balls)

Nothing Is Original ™ : A Flume Retrospective

When you think about it, nothing is original.  Ideas, trends, movements, revolutions, and blogs are rehashed every so often in the history of mankind.  It’s one of the reasons that older people are more relaxed, while people in their 20′s are so excitable.  (Other reasons are that old farts know they’re dying, and twenty-somethings of today are fighting their natural instinct to procreate.)

 

Most trends come back around during one’s lifetime, so older folks are less likely to get worked up over ”the next big thing.”  Movies are a great example:

 

Whippersnapper:   Ooh, Ben Affleck and a bunch of other B-listers are in a great new movie called ‘Pearl Harbor!’  Let’s go see it!

Gray Balls:  Eh, I saw ‘From Here to Eternity’ 35 years ago, I think I’ll pass.

 

Perception of beauty is the same.  Styles and preferences come and go, but really the industry revolves around trying to come up with something “different.”  Well “different” is relative, and luckily for the machine, our memories are short, so what is considered “different” is really just “not what we did last year.”  Sophia Loren is beautiful?  No, Mia Farrow is.  No, Raquel Welch.  No, Twiggy.  No, Elle MacPherson.  No, Kate Moss.  No, Laetitia Casta.  No, Cameron Diaz.  No, Bar Refaeli…

Where do you like to rest your head?

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