Boston, MA – Are you one of the millions of men that are prone to untimely, crippling erections? Do you curse yourself for wearing khakis when meeting a beautiful woman because you know a reputation-ending trouser rocket isn’t far behind? What if I told you I had yet another invention idea to help cure your erectile dysfectile? What if someone developed some kind of half-inch thick rubber underpants, or perhaps a typical cotton panty with a front pouch that was re-inforced with a titanium net? As the blood begins its’ hourly rush to your helmet, the underpants would restrain your boner from poking through your pants, so you’re protected whether you’re trying to spy on milfs in the changing rooms at TJ Maxx by banking your line of vision off a mirror, or would simply like to relax at the beach without having to put your dick through the opening of a box of Wheat Thins. I can even envision them coming with a small drainage area for guys that leak a little bit when they see cleavage.
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