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Women Are Awful

"I'm in hell" - the guy

 

Boston, MA – Gee, I wonder whose idea this was. Who else would come up with a costume idea where the couple literally has to spend the entire night together? Part of the fun of going to a party is hugging your buddies girlfriend’s, or wives, and imagining their breasts as they touch you, right? Well, you can’t do that with this costume. To be fair, at least this is an original idea, and I’d be remiss if I didn’t say Little Martin was thinking about worming his way between those. And this is definitely better than “Let’s go as two M & M’s!” or Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf. But women are always trying to get us to do even more romantic stuff together, as if being married and pounding that pussy every 7 weeks wasn’t enough. One time, Mrs. Munson tried to get me on a tandem bike, but I told her the only way that’s ever going to happen is to let me ride up front so I can turn around, blowtorch the frame, and watch her and the tail end go off a ramp and into a pond.

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